Sign In

    A Brief Introduction to Funeral Etiquette

    Last updated 8 months ago

    If you have questions about how to behave or what to say at a funeral, you’re not alone. Many people go for long periods without attending a funeral, so questions about what to expect are normal. When you’re unsure about how to approach a funeral service, contact the funeral home. They will be able to explain what to expect. This advice will also help you better understand funeral etiquette:


    Black and dark-colored clothing are traditional for funerals, but they are no longer the only acceptable things to wear. In some cases, families may request that guests dress in a way that honors their deceased loved one. If you’re not sure how to dress, remember that this is a solemn occasion and that choosing a conservative outfit is best. Opt for business or church clothes, like a suit or dress. Keep in mind that makeup and hair should also be toned down.


    As a general rule of thumb, seating is distributed according the nature of the relationship with the deceased. If you are paying respects to a co-worker or acquaintance, stick to the back of the room. In some cases, there will be an usher at the funeral to assist you in finding the right seat. If you’re feeling unsure about where to sit, it is best to err on the side of caution and sit towards the back, unless you are told otherwise.


    At the end of a funeral, the guests leave the room in reverse order, with those in the front following behind the casket and the rest of the seats emptying front to back. So if you are in the back of the room, you will leave last. Family of the deceased will usually remain in front of the ceremony site to thank people for attending. If there is a burial service afterwards, funeral attendees are welcome to go, unless the family has asked that it be private. However, funeral attendees are not obligated to go to the burial service.

    Chapel of the Chimes in Hayward is here to ensure that all memorial services run smoothly. Contact us with questions or to find out how we can help you with funeral planning by calling (866) 475-9407. 

    Finding the Right Flowers for a Grieving Loved One

    Last updated 9 months ago

    Giving flowers is a considerate way to show support to a grieving loved one and that you’re keeping him or her in your thoughts. Traditionally, certain flowers and arrangements are given in sympathy. The rules are relaxing on these guidelines, but it can be helpful to know some of the customs associated with sympathy flowers and funeral flowers. Here are some tips for selecting the perfect floral arrangement:

    Ensure Flowers Are Welcome

    Although flowers are customary gifts for a grieving loved one, they are not always the right choice. In some cases, families prefer that a donation to a charity be made in lieu of a gift of flowers. You can find this information in the obituary or by calling the funeral home. Flowers are also not appropriate for Jewish families sitting Shiva. For Shiva, send desserts or baskets of kosher food instead.

    Understand Sympathy Flowers vs. Funeral Flowers

    To select the right flowers, start by deciding if you wish to send sympathy flowers or funeral flowers. Sympathy flowers are sent to the home of the bereaved and tend to be small bouquets, centerpieces, or arrangements. Funeral flowers are sent directly to the funeral home to be displayed at any visitation or memorial service held. Funeral flowers tend to be much larger wreaths and arrangements. They may also incorporate a tribute to the deceased, such as a sash that reads, “Beloved Friend.”

    Choose Appropriate Flowers

    Lilies and roses are often incorporated into sympathy and funeral flower arrangements. However, it is acceptable to choose other flowers, particularly if the deceased has a favorite type. Note that sympathy flowers don’t have to be solemn colors. Bright, spring colors can suggest a sense of renewal and hope.

    Chapel of the Chimes in Hayward is here to help you choose the proper floral tribute to present to a lost loved one. You can even order flowers and other sympathy gifts directly from our online store. To learn more about all our funeral home services, please call (866) 475-9407.  

    How to Talk to Children about the Loss of a Loved One

    Last updated 9 months ago

    Helping your child deal with the loss of a loved one can be extremely challenging, not least of all because you are going through a difficult time yourself. It is normal to have concerns about what to share with a child and what to hold back. This video offers some amazing advice.

    Although it may be tempting to try to make everything OK for your child after a loss and shield him or her from the grief, it is important to allow him or her to experience grief. Acknowledge that it is natural to be sad and even angry, but that you can get through it together. Encourage your child to vocalize his or her feelings by talking to your child about some of your own emotions.

    At Chapel of the Chimes in Hayward, we have grief support services that can help your entire family find peace in your time of loss. Find out more about our funeral home by calling (866) 475-9407. 

    Suggestions for Writing Your Loved One's Obituary

    Last updated 9 months ago

    Writing an obituary for a lost loved one can seem overwhelming. You may feel pressure to capture in print how special that person was to you, but remember that an obituary is primarily an announcement. Approaching it as an informational piece, rather an emotional memoriam, can help make the writing process easier. Here are some other useful tips to keep in mind:

    Check with the Funeral Home

    Before you begin writing, check in with your funeral home. Many funeral homes file obituaries on the family’s behalf as part of their services, and others are willing to do so for you, even if it is not part of their standard offerings. Your funeral home may ask you to fill out a form with information about your loved one so they can prepare the obituary and submit it to the newspaper for you.

    Research the Guidelines

    All newspapers have their own rules when it comes to obituaries. Some will accept any obituary written by anyone, while others have obituary writers on staff and only publish their work. Your local newspaper may also have restrictions on formatting and word count that you need to know. If you don’t follow the paper’s rules, your obituary may be delayed or rejected completely.

    Include Important Information

    When you write your loved one’s obituary, it is important to provide basic biographical information, including family members, the schools he or she attended, where he or she worked, military service, and any special memberships or hobbies he or she had. This information helps acquaintances recognize the deceased. It is also essential to use the obituary to make announcements about times for any visitation services and the funeral. If you prefer donations to a favorite charity in lieu of flowers, specify that in the obituary.

    Turn to the staff at Chapel of the Chimes in Hayward for help with your loved one’s obituary. Our compassionate funeral home team can also help you create a fitting memorial service to remember your lost friend or family member. When you need our assistance, please call (866) 475-9407. 

    How to Make Life Easier for Your Loved Ones after Your Passing

    Last updated 10 months ago

    No one likes to think of leaving friends and family behind, but an even more disconcerting thought is the idea of leaving loved ones to handle unsettled affairs. There are many things you can do to ease the burden on your loved ones while they are dealing with your passing. Here are just a few of the ways you can provide a little bit of stability for your loved ones, even after you’re gone:

    Preplan Your Funeral

    Funeral planning is a demanding process that has to be completed under the worst possible circumstances. The friends and family of someone who has passed are often left with worries about satisfying last wishes and meeting significant costs. By preplanning your funeral, you can take all of these burdens off the shoulders of your loved ones. They won’t have to be concerned about not giving you a tribute you would have wanted, since you will design your own service. When you preplan your funeral, you can even pay some or all of your funeral expenses, so your loved ones don’t have to face the costs.

    Create a Will

    A will solves so much conflict for family and friends after the passing of a loved one. No matter the size of your estate, a will ensures that your property goes to exactly who you want to have it. It can prevent squabbles and hard feelings while giving your loved ones one less hassle to worry about. Work with a lawyer to draw up your will to ensure that it doesn’t include any problematic ambiguities.

    Buy Life Insurance

    Even a small life insurance policy can make a big difference to your family after you pass. In addition to helping to cover funeral costs, a life insurance policy can give your family some time to come to terms with the loss of your income and make financial decisions.

    Chapel of the Chimes in Hayward can help you plan your funeral so that your family doesn’t have to. Give them the peace of mind of knowing they are giving you the service you would have wanted and help lighten the financial load. Start the process today by calling (866) 475-9407. 

Do you like Chapel of the Chimes Hayward?

  • Hours:

  • 8:30 AM to 5:00 PM Sunday
  • 8:30 AM to 5:00 PM Monday
  • 8:30 AM to 5:00 PM Tuesday
  • 8:30 AM to 5:00 PM Wednesday
  • 8:30 AM to 5:00 PM Thursday
  • 8:30 AM to 5:00 PM Friday
  • 8:30 AM to 5:00 PM Saturday


  • Recent Posts
    • Loading posts... Spinner
  • View All
  • Recent Comments
    • Loading comments... Spinner
  • Popular Tags
    • Loading tags... Spinner